It's been a while...

since i've posted anything. it's suddenly november and everything is happening at once. a quarter of the year has passed me by already and it won't be long until summer is breathing over my shoulder again, before freedom is mere inches from my fingertips. right now, it feels okay just filling out applications and memorizing lines for dinner theater and spending time with my friends whenever possible and reading shakespeare, but this is impermanent. i'm content, yes, but i'm also okay with the fact that things will change. in fact, i'll be standing there with open arms to embrace whatever change comes. i've learned with time to expect the unexpected. life should be about living, not spending every moment obsessing and worrying over the implications of doing so. sometimes it takes almost getting hit by a car in boston and the first good cry i've had in over six months and an hour just sitting on the dead, crumbling leaves with my best friend absorbing the moment and enjoying the breeze and watching change in the making to really be okay with everything. and i am. okay with everything, that is. as i've said before, "the only constant is change." and to me, that really is beautiful. i like knowing that there is always room for improvement when things seem to be going downhill, that there will be tough stuff to make you remember who you really are when you lose yourself in blind happiness, that things happen that will humble you and remind you of what you have, that change is always around the corner. if you don't like the way something is, wait a little while and things will be different. if you don't like the way things are going, change the course of events. i'm rambling, but that's okay. everything is okay. things are good, things are bad, things are strange, things are mundane, things are exciting...but everything changes. always. and change helps you grow. change is beautiful.